Wumblr//In Ethiopia

30th October 2009

Post

She Started Evil

All the thingsyou say more than kill me inside
They torture me painfully and stroke your pride
When I hide
Run with my tail in my jeans
Smile and cry
Eyes bloodshit
All I want to do is scream
It was simple
My proposal
It was easy
My inquiry
Just to say yet
And lift me up
Stop being jealous
of my daddy
my father
my image
the one who understood
Don’t look inside my feelings
Don’t read my sadistic thoughts
Don’t think you won the battle
That my sick mind just lost

29th October 2009

Post

More yrteoP

Creep
Can you feel the pain
It’s inside of your head
What is love?
But pressure unfolding
Engraving butterflies in your stomach
The one you ate
The one you made fly
The day you killed my shame
To go through that again
You left me dead
Your dark green bed
Your white tube socks
And black mesh hoodie
Doing drugs
Being Chill
I miss you
Sometimes I wish
You missed me too

That Guy
Bleeding nostrils
Streaking me red
Don’t love the high
Know how to fly
Creeping up the ladder
Only to fall beneath the ground
Don’t love me
Just fuck me
Cruelly
Ruthlessly
Don’t hold me
Buy me death
And set it on fire
Inhale
Exhale
Relax
Fog
Sleep
Fall
Nap
Crash
Burn
Die

28th October 2009

Post

yrteoP

Sadie
I shouldn’t be the one to feel this pain
I can’t fucking believe I’m doing this again
Your menopausal mood swings are more than torture to endure
Your boring and repetitive lectures are conscious rambles you intentionally direct towards me
You ambivalent peice of garbage Please take pity on those worthy of
Some mercy
Or some mother fucking peace I don’t even have a distracting cock
Looming over my thoughts
Keeping me from blowing up into a sea
Of apathy
No, this time, I’m enjoying the comfort Of appropriating your Tylenol
Much like my summer fling with 4 or 5 Advil
Whenever my real emotions spring a leak
Rape me blasting my ears, Panadol filling the cracks of my blurry eyesight
Exit here. in my face As imaginary foes make their pace

Shady
I can tell he’s uncomfortable
Because all he ever does is leave
In such a hurry he can’t say bye
He doesn’t even take me He used to try and convince me
That I was worth thinking about
But now including me is out the question
and I don’t even fucking care
Because all these people are full of shit
I need a pill that full of hits
Smacks that hit me in the face and remind me reality’s in my way
Crying and realizing
Sleeping to Nirvana’s ‘Unplugged’
Bleeding wrists and underwear
Black socks and purple shirts 400mg is not enough
Wondering if I can convince her I’m still
Fucked up
Is my only escape from the grudges I hold
The envy I carry and the exhaust of my fucking shoulders.

Pathetic, Useless, and Addicted
Still useless and friendless
Not even he can cure me
If only that mother fucker
Had stayed behind again and again
A light
A pill
I need a hit
A cut
Someone to feel
I just might take that scum bag’s offer
If I think of a way to get what I want
So distracted and blind
It shouldn’t be hard to fill my hole
With the mass needed to bond
I wonder
If that scumbag was serious
When he asked
If I was free for the weekend
Cause he wanted to get trashed
I’d take him up on that offer right now
Cause I’m sober and leaking
Taking pills from a box
Saving money for fags.

Indulgence
Stick it in between my fingers
Watch it burn as I breath slow…

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16th October 2009

Post

Rgiht not wnorg.

Why can’t she read between the lines.
When it comes to listening to opinions other than her own
She melts
Completely Liquid
Nothing I can do to stop her from dictating my life
And no guilt for hope of mine
I’m not sublime.
I anything other
I’m this
I’m not her
I’m him
I love him
He loves me back
Thats enough
This is for her
I love him
I love him more than I notice or care for you
Or any other.

3rd September 2009

Post

And to all you lonely boys; I will be president

She said Apathy is the only way out
The only way to cope it to not care
But I don’t believe in the advice of one so unexperienced
I don’t know who to believe, true.

There are other ways out

There must be another way to cope

There must be another way to live

.

25th August 2009

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Getting Over It

Sometimes the best way to heal a wound is to focus on the pain it’s caused.
To remember why and how you got it.
You have to focus and listen intently to the pulse until it owns your attention.
Feel the heat of your heart radiating throughout your brain
Listen and watch all the thoughts that clutter you
Until your numb.
Your pain is numb and your wound is healing.

All the while you focus on the motion
Of your wound.
From the flesh
To the blood
To the heart
To your head
Where is rests
Nice in peace
Forever remember
The deceased
And the pain
That you caused
While the living
Walked the ground
Always sorry
For the torture
You put them through
While around.

25th August 2009

Post

PuffyEyes;BlurrySight

Wow.
Instead of just getting my stupid ass dragged into some meaningless source of entertainment.
Instead of just me getting punished for not thinking
Instead of just me

I pulled her in, too.

I dragged her, when I thought I was trying so carefully to keep her awake
Lulled almost to her fucking death
Bravo, winta.
BRAVOOOO

How ‘bout a fucking round of applause

Well, I guess I wasn’t thinking too clearly about trying to keep her with me
I guess I just wasn’t smart enough
Now I’m restricted.
Surprise, surprise.

She’s on her mother fucking period
Well, so am I!!

Just because her mom has authority
And makes a monthly ‘oops’
Doesn’t give Dru her enough justification to put up with this shit

And Bam
Ami
Amber
Bambi
TheJock
TheBandGeek
TheMatureOne
TheMediator
TheMiddlechild

She was meant to handle the situation.
More maturely than anyone
In this fucking mess that

I

fucking made

Sorry.

23rd August 2009

Post

SittingwithKalkidan

She is the culture. Truly fake. Sometimes I think I should be angry, at God, maybe for reminding me of where I come from.
Rather than presenting myself as AChildOfGod.
I’m the Ethiopian

WintanaAsnackeWolana

Half Eritrean.
Parents from warzones. I couldn’t be more sick of hearing the story, about them meeting in secret, not doing dangerous things, like knowing each other wasn’t dangerous enough, because they know the consequences paid in the end.
Sometimes, I think I should be thankfull.
To be from such a place of such strong culture and meaning.
To be from somewhere so enforcing, that Aaron, of all people, can’t escape the colors of that dreaded Ethiopian flag.
And to attach those dreaded three collaborations of art to for monstrosity, to his ears.
Which are a gift.
From God.